November 2024
How Important Is It?
by Theodore L
I am an inveterate to-do list maker. I write things down and then prioritize them. I try to make the most important thing to accomplish number one on my list, followed by the second most important thing and so on. When I complete the first thing on my list, you might think I simply move on to the number 2 item on the list, but emotionally that’s not what happens.
Emotionally the number one item is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING I HAVE TO DO TODAY! Once I complete that first task then the second thing on my list becomes THE MOST IMPORTANT THING I HAVE TO DO TODAY! If that sounds like a “so what” to you, think about it from an emotional standpoint for a moment.
My number one task, the doctor’s appointment that it took 3 months to get, really is important to my day. The number 2 item on my to-do list, buying new shoelaces, really doesn’t matter all that much.
Just moving that unimportant number 2 on my list to number 1, it takes on the importance of the most important thing I have to get done today. Emotionally, I have to get to the store and get those shoelaces! In reality, it’s a minor thing and if I don’t get the shoelaces, I’ll just wear a different pair of shoes.
I realized at this stage of my recovery how many times I made something relatively minor into a big deal. Seeing it in its proper perspective helped me to stop taking many of the things that bothered me so seriously.
I am beginning to actually follow the Al-Anon suggestion and ask myself: “How important is it?”
Fall Assembly
by Mr. Gratitude
We came.
We listened.
We voted.
We laughed.
We cried.
We left.
You are invited!
AIS needs you!
by Dave M
Current Service
Opportunities
*Chair - 2025 (Elected position)*
*Vice Chair - 2025 (Elected position)*
*Secretary- 2025 (Elected position)*
*Treasurer - 2025 (Elected position)*
Outreach Coordinator
Phone Coordinator
Phone Volunteers
If you are interested in a particular area of service, please contact
chair@seattle-al-anon.org
The 2024 Annual AIS Council meeting will be held November 14th starting at 7:30 pm on Zoom.
The annual meeting differs from regular monthly meetings in two ways:
1. Election of Officers (Chair, Vice Chair, Treasurer and Secretary) for 2025.
The term for officer positions in AIS is one year.
Information on the officer positions can be located on the Member Resources tab on the AIS Website.
If you are interested in being considered please contact me at chair@seattle-al-anon.org
2. 2025 Budget Presentation
Our financial operating vision for 2025 will be presented to the group, discussed and approved.
I would like to share a quotation from Reaching for Personal Freedom (P.164) that my predecessor, Karen L shared a couple of years ago that I still think rings true today:
“Concept Eleven reminds us that there are enough people – with a diverse range of viewpoints and an abundance of skills and talents – to share the burden of the most difficult tasks. It would be short sighted for us to work alone, when working with others would be both easier and more effective.”
In closing, each Al-Anon Family Group has a voice and a vote through their Group Rep or Alternate Group Rep and I encourage you to come and have your group’s voice heard! Please Come - All are welcome
Zoom Invitation
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/83969570120?pwd=QUt3Z1V4WUJOT2VVK3dsQ0ZIaVdmUT09
Al-Anon’s Newest CAL
by Linda H
Al-Anon’s newest piece of Conference Approved Literature, Healing Within Our Alcoholic Relationships (P-95), is now available. Seattle AIS will stock it in English and Spanish. This 48-page booklet captures the essence of the Al-Anon program in a series of brief but powerful messages of timeless wisdom, adapted from Al-Anon literature on relationships, including The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage (B-4). It is perfect for newcomers or anyone needing to “Keep It Simple” and get back to basics.
The first third of the booklet provides some “Instant Al-Anon” that highlights the various ways our program can help us heal within our relationships. The remainder of the book lists 5 or 6 questions related to each of the Steps, Traditions and Concepts to ask ourselves about our relationships. As we avail ourselves of other resources for deeper study, we may find in time that the Steps have helped us learn how to love ourselves, the Traditions have helped us learn how to love others, and the Concepts have helped us learn how to love the world.
Step Eleven
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
Photo by Callie D
Positive Attitude
by Clif H
I had the opportunity recently to attend the WA Area Fall Assembly in Moses Lake as a group representative for my home group. Carpooling over, we experienced a significant traffic backup, adding over an hour, not quite two, to our anticipated 2 1/2-hour commute. During that part of the day, I focused on the last thing I discussed with my wife before leaving home. "This will be a weekend of practicing patience." There I was, my first opportunity.
We finally arrived at the hotel and got checked in. Ahhh, smooth flowing.
My carpool buddy and I headed to dinner at a restaurant known to be across the parking lot from one of the town’s very few chargers compatible with my electric vehicle (EV). After messing around for nearly an hour, including a lengthy phone call with service support, she concluded that the system was broken and off-line. My car was down to 21 miles of juice, not nearly enough to make the 180-mile return drive home. I'm expressing concern to my buddy, but I steadfastly maintained that it would all work out. Being well qualified to be a member of Al-Anon, my passenger was busy searching the internet looking for other possible charging stations. He was attempting to control something completely out of his control.
As I continued to maintain my positivity, my rider was not only getting more and more anxious, he'd begun poking fun at me for my outward expression that it would be ok, that my higher power would provide a solution.
I slept well. Patience continued to play out. Morning arrived and I got up and headed out for my morning walk. I just needed to work out a few kinks from sleeping in the hotel bed. Along the way, I inadvertently located an EV charge station nearby. Upon checking with the station owner, they confirmed its availability for public use. So, I hooked up.
Upon informing my partner in crime that the solution presented itself during my walk, he just smiled and expressed surprise with the solution presented. Mostly, he shared his amazement by how my confidence never wavered.
Ultimately, my car was successfully recharged, Fall Assembly was successfully concluded, and we returned home without incident. Participation at my first Assembly turned out to be as much an exercise in practicing patience as I'd expected, though with the right attitude, the entire weekend was an excellent experience. As clearly stated in the Preamble to the Twelve Steps, "...changed attitudes can aid in recovery."
Healing Chair
by Stanette R
To sit
In the Healing Chair
Is some of our
Most valuable work
Indeed alone or
In Sacred Circles
Speaking our Truth
Sometimes halting
Ugly crying
Sobbing
Let it
All come
Out
Let recognition
Of the many
Truths be seen
It's time to heal
To know ourselves
Breathe deep
It's also time
To break chains
Form new pathways
The Healing Chair
Is always available
Won't you
Take a seat?
Electronic Meetings
by Teresa H
Is your group meeting online ONLY? If so, you may need to update your group records.
Why? When in person meetings were curtailed during COVID, WSO allowed groups to temporarily meet online. That move helped maintain our fellowship during that disruptive time. However, at the 2023 World Service Conference it was stated that “Groups can stay temporarily online until six to twelve months after the Area makes a final decision regarding accepting electronic groups.” Groups in WA Area are now past that deadline and need to register as a permanent Electronic Group. Some groups have already completed the necessary paperwork. Many have not.
What difference does it make? Newcomers and other members who don’t usually attend your meeting can turn to three different websites for meeting listings: WSO, WA Area, and AIS. On the WSO and WA Area sites, groups not registered correctly may appear to be meeting in person only resulting in newcomers showing up where you used to meet or the group listing may be so confusing that the newcomer can’t tell if it is online or in person. It is important that we are providing clear, accurate information for those still suffering from the effects of someone else’s drinking.
How do we tell if our group is listed properly? Go to the WSO website at al-anon.org and search for your meeting by entering your city. If you are listed correctly, there will be a big ELECTRONIC blue box in your listing and on the map your location pin will be square instead of round.
How do we correct our online group registration if we are not listed as ELECTRONIC on the WSO site? Your online only group has three options of where to participate in the Al-Anon service structure: Remain in your current district (if they have online or hybrid business meetings), join a new WA Area district 35 that is for online groups only, or join the WSO Global Electronic Area. If you wish to continue to be part of Seattle AIS and be listed on our meeting directory, you must choose your current district or a district within AIS that best represents the demographics of your group members. If you don’t know your current district, you can find it in your current AIS meeting directory listing. The article “Electronic Group Registration: Geographic Area or Global Electronic Area?” in this issue may be helpful.
Where do we go to correct our listing? All online group changes are now made on the WSO website. Please use the Electronic Group Change Form. Do not use any other form. You can find detailed instructions for filling out the form HERE. I found it to be a very quick and easy process.
Electronic Group Registration: Geographic Area or Global Electronic Area?
Part of the registration process for Al‑Anon electronic groups is determining whether a group wants to register with the geographic Area or with the Global Electronic Area (GEA). The questions below can be used to guide the group in making an informed decision.
What audience is the group seeking to attract? Are you hoping for members from nearby geographically or around the world?
Where does the group want to vote and contribute: in its geographic Area or in the GEA?
Does the group want its meeting information included on both al-anon.org plus a local website such as an Al‑Anon Information Service or District meeting directory, or does it prefer to appear only on the global electronic meeting search on al-anon.org?
Is the geographic Area in which the group is based accepting electronic groups, and does the Area have a process in place to connect the group to the links of service?
Discussing these questions in a business meeting will help the group decide where to register. Don’t hesitate to contact your Area Group Records Coordinator, District Representative, or the World Service Office to answer any additional questions that might arise.
The Forum, October 2024
Reprinted with permission of Al‑Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, Virginia, USA.
Are You Ready to Welcome Newcomers this Holiday Season?
The holidays are approaching quickly. For newcomers seeking help at this time of year, please make sure that your group meeting information is correct.
Ask yourself and your group, “What did I need when I went to my first meeting?” Specific location or login instructions about your meeting can be helpful to a newcomer attending Al‑Anon/Alateen for the first time. We want everyone to feel welcome in our Al‑Anon and Alateen meetings!
Has the group’s temporary electronic meeting information been removed from your group record if you’re back to meeting in person? Is it current? If not, you can update it here.
Is there a special door to gain access to the building or a room number for the Al‑Anon/Alateen meeting?
Are there passwords or login instructions needed to join the Al‑Anon/Alateen meeting electronically?
Is there a sign on the door or chat notice to alert people if your group won’t be meeting that week? (For example, “Not meeting on Thanksgiving.”)
Is there a volunteer from the group to be a “Greeter” for those attending your Al‑Anon meeting for the first time?
Submit your Al‑Anon group changes online anytime throughout the year. For help with submitting Alateen changes, contact your Area Alateen Process Person.
The Forum, October 2024
Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, Virginia, USA.
I Do Belong in Al‑Anon
Some people can remember the exact date they first came to an Al‑Anon meeting. I do not. I remember, though, the exact situation that caused me to follow through on actually walking into my first meeting. It was the day I had to drive my son to the center of town, tell him that he could no longer live at home, and drop him off. He seemed far more at ease with this than I felt. As I drove off, his parting look seemed to imply, “What took you so long?”
I was warmly welcomed to my first meeting and every meeting thereafter, yet I was always questioning whether I really belonged. Every time the meeting leader would ask if there were any newcomers, I would start to raise my hand, then tell myself, Stop! Don’t raise your hand. This is your fourth, twelfth, sixteenth meeting.
Honestly, it was only after I’d been to quite a few meetings that I finally listened closely and actually heard the final sentence of Tradition Three: “The only requirement for membership is that there be a problem of alcoholism in a relative or friend.” At that point, I was finally able to relax and feel that, yes, if that is all that is required, I actually do belong here, and this is the place for me.
I also learned how important it is to actually listen carefully to the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions each time they are read, as I never know when a Higher Power will allow me to hear something in a new way that will bring me closer to self-understanding and that slippery idea of serenity.
By Michael M., Maine
Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, VA.
Tradition Eleven
Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, films, and TV. We need guard with special care the anonymity of all AA members.
Need a Free Newcomer Packet?
Anyone local to Seattle who is a newcomer and wants an individual newcomer packet (or in Spanish, too!), please submit your request via the New To Al-Anon page, or send an email to outreach@seattle-al-anon.org with the name and mailing address.
Group Records
Is your group not listed correctly in the meeting directories? Do you need to make group records changes?
In Person and Hybrid Groups
Submit your correct information to WA Area by using the form on the WA Area website. You may have to log in first. If you don’t have an account, you will need to set one up.
https://wa-al-anon.org/group-records-request-a-change/
Online ONLY Groups
Submit your correct information to WSO by using the Electronic Group Change form at al-anon.org. If this is the first time using that form, here are some handy instructions.
AIS will be sent a copy of the changes by WA Area and by WSO via the Area Group Records Coordinator.
AIS will make the change as soon as possible. For Online ONLY groups, please allow up to 10 days for the change to appear on the AIS meeting directory. If your listing is correct on WA Area AND WSO, but not on AIS, please email meetingdirectoryeditor@seattle-al-anon.org.
Requesting Phone Volunteers
Contact the Phones Coordinator
Phones@seattle-al-anon.org or call/text 206-625-0000
Concept of the Month
by Allen L
Concept Eleven
The World Service Office is composed of selected committees, executives and staff members.
Few of us came to Al-Anon because our lives were going well. In the natural first rush to solve the immediate problems we focused on the Steps. Once we began to see improvement in our life, we could expand our program to include the Traditions. As growth continued, I actually listened to the group service positions give their activity reports. I began to understand the larger Al-Anon structure and how that structure supports my individual groups.
The Al-Anon Service Manual explains what the selected committees are, what the executives’ duties are, and how the staff fits into the management of worldwide Al-Anon. Reading this for the first time, the structure might seem complicated and remote.
These quotes from the 2022-2025 Al-Anon/Alateen Service Manual may help to make things simpler:
Service Committees:
None of these service committees are executive in character. They do not manage or conduct the active affairs of the service departments. (P.208)
Executives:
Any active service, to function well, must be managed by a competent Executive. It must always be directed by one person, supported by such Staff as needed. This function must be delegated to an individual with ample freedom and authority to do the job without interference, so long as the work is done well. (P.213)
photo by Clif H
Staff Members:
Certain key people at the World Service Office (WSO) must be Al‑Anon members. Some of these key paid personnel have a vote on our Committees and Corporate Boards. It is not a requirement that clerical Staff be Al‑Anon members. (P.214)
While these people do make many day-to-day decisions their authority is always subject to the Steps, the Traditions, and the Concepts of Service. The selected committees, executives, and staff members authority is always limited by Concept One: The ultimate responsibility and authority for Al-Anon world services belongs to the Al-Anon groups.
Concept Eleven
The World Service Office is composed of selected committees, executives and staff members.
AIS Council Meeting
The next Council meeting is Thursday, November 14th, 2024, 7:30-9:00 pm. Check the AIS website calendar (https://www.seattle-al-anon.org/events) for the zoom link.
NOTE Meeting Topics:
Officer Elections & 2025 Budget Presentation
AIS Board Meeting
The next Board Meeting will be established by the 2025 Chair.
Detachment Allows Us to Let Go
by Callie D
…of our obsession with another’s behavior (Al-Anon Detachment bookmark). In my experience, part of the magnetic pull to rescue/save an alcoholic is the intermittent times of rationality and calm. That may sound strange, but those times tend to give me false hope and almost hypnotize me into magical thinking. Plus, I really want the best for people in my life, and to have a viable connection with them!
It is truly exhausting and crazy making to live around alcoholics and be the sober, responsible, empathic, and rational one. It’s kind of like playing a pinball machine. Bumping and thumping the paddles in the fight against the law of gravity. It’s easy to waste a lot of time and energy, just to end up in the futility of the game.
Even though I’ve been through that chaotic and insane cycle hundreds of times, I am still vulnerable to getting hooked into the alcoholics “stuff.” It is so hard to detach when you live in the same house, and everything that happens tends to directly affect you. There are so many levels of deception and dysfunction happening at the same time. There is the “perception” of progress and of things going well, but it tends to be a mirage. It is an assault to my heart and mind when the alcoholic suddenly acts out, takes belligerent risks, and/or becomes verbally abusive.
I’ve noticed that when I am away, or on opposite schedules than the alcoholic, my life is more manageable. One convoluted encounter, nasty note, or voicemail from the alcoholic can ruin my day. I have invested so many personal resources, searching for a way to navigate living with this person I love.
I am trying to accept the reality that I am “powerless over alcohol,” and that I am not responsible for the outcomes of the alcoholic’s choices. It is so confusing and painful when they work against their own best interests. Then they act shocked when things don’t work out the way they want!
I have found myself agonizingly obsessed with the alcoholic’s issues as I try to decipher if I am enabling. I understand, now, when a parent is playing into the manipulation of their child’s addictions. Or when a spouse allows their own denial to cover the deception of their actively drinking partner. I am surrounded by friends and family members who drink, and I am deeply affected by that dynamic.
I find more comfort in letting go when I release my loved ones into the care of my Higher Power. I also pray for truth, guidance, insight, and wisdom. It is time to move more fully into my own life, and have the “courage to change the things I can.”
Subscribe to The Forum
Al-Anon’s monthly magazine features timely sharing’s from Al-Anon and Alateen members, suggested meeting topics, and the latest information on worldwide Al-Anon recovery. Experience and insight you won’t find anywhere else!
October 2024 AIS Council Meeting Minutes (Summary, not yet approved)
Seattle Al-Anon Information Service Council Minutes October 10, 2024 7:30-9:00 pm
Meeting opened at 7:30 pm by Dave M - Chair
In attendance: 18 attendees
Serenity Prayer
Introductions
Readings: Concept 10-Sandra
Secretary Report: Kathy K - Approval of the August minutes
Chair Report: Dave M
Fall Assembly
Attendance was reported at 148. 70 in person, 78 online.
New panel elected. Delegate: Kimberly, Alt Delegate: Julianna, WA Chair: Gary, WA Alt Chair: Nena, Treasurer: Helen and Secretary: Amber
2025 Budget presented and approved. (0 balance budget)
Electronic Meeting motion on agenda requiring CMA (Current Mailing Address) of a meeting to reside in Washington State was withdrawn after discussion and vote by AWSC members.
KBDM presented and subsequent motion to rescind 2023 EG Motion requiring Group Rep and Alternate group rep to be active in Washington Area was presented and dis-cussed, amended, discussed and then voted on and passed. There is no distinction between Al-Anon meetings.
Board Meeting
Fourth quarter meeting next Thursday, October 17 at 7:00 pm. Key agenda items are 3rd quarter financial results and 2025 Budget presentation. Board Meeting are at-tended by District Representatives, Officers and Coordinators but any member is welcome to attend.
AIS November meeting is our Annual Meeting. Key items on the agenda will be the Election of 2025 Officers (Chair, Vice Chair, Treasurer and Secretary) and discussion and approval of the 2025 AIS Budget.
Discussion: He was asked about criteria for members interested in running for office. You do not have to be a current Council member. There are written job descriptions available, and you can contact Dave for more information. Gary noted that AIS is above the group level service so AA members cannot run for office.
Vice Chair Report: Arden C. No report this month.
Treasurer’s Report: Gary H - Donations were down a little in August, however AIS remains in good financial shape.
Gary was thanked for his service to AIS over the last 2 years.
Coordinator Reports:
Phones: Heather R
Contact: phones@seattle-al-anon.org or can just call or text the AIS phone number 206-625-0000 to volunteer.
VOLUNTEERS:
· 18 available volunteers
· 9 were active in September
· One new, potential volunteer
CALLS & TEXTS:
· Received 43 calls and 23 texts = 66 points of contact.
· Three (3) non-al-anon
· ZERO ACTIVITY DAYS: seven (7)
VOLUNTEERING NEEDS: Please let your groups know that members can volunteer as little as once a month!
ACTIVITIES:
Work on updating Phone Manual
Research what happens if a text recipient replies HELP or STOP
Heather R will be stepping down at the end of this year. She has really enjoyed her service and recommends that members consider asking other group members directly in regard to phone service. She will be looking at her team to see if another person will step up as coordinator.
LDC: Mary R -
Mary Attended the quarterly WSO AIS/LDC Informational Meeting
Nothing new to report there, except that they reiterated how important the cooperation between AIS/LDC and their respective Areas is. AIS & LDC does have a vote in the Area Assemblies etc.
(Service Manual P. 176 - 177)
Communications: MJ
Reminder: we have one open position coming soon: Newsletter Editor (the Bits) – the current editor is stepping down in December.
Events Editor Shannon is stepping down at the end of the year. Thank you for your service, Shannon! I’m happy to say that our new Web Editor, Tom, is willing to take on the Events Editor position along with being the Web Editor.
Linda is staying on as Meeting Directory Editor for at least another year. Thank you for your service, Linda!
Tech: Pierre J (Absent per written report)
This past month I reviewed the various tech related accounts I track (Comcast, Mi-crosoft, Square Space, GoDaddy and Zoom) to ensure notifications for billing, outages or any other notification went to the right AIS member and I tried to ensure we had no single point of failure (no single notification going to only one person, or only to someone's personal email address).
While doing this I worked with my predecessor (Doug L) to ensure that the primary own-ership of the Comcast account was with an AIS account, and that both Tech@ and Treasurer@ were copied on all comcast related emails (as this was not the case previ-ously).
Aside from this, I received and completed some requests for addition/removal of mem-bers from the Council distribution list.
If you know anyone who needs to be added to the list, please ask them to send me a re-quest email at tech@seattle-al-anon.org.
If anyone on the distribution list would like to be removed from the list, just let me know and I will take care of it (just reply to this email and let me know you would like to be re-moved) That's all the action on the tech front.
Discussion: There are currently 58 people on the distribution list and Arden asked if there is an opt out tab (unsubscribe) in our email distributions. Arden will talk to Pierre about this.
Outreach: Solveig W
1. I am still in NZ for a few more weeks but will be back at the end of this month. I'm managing the Outreach activities via email and Zoom, with the help of Dave (Newcomer packets) and Teresa (ad creative stuff), and Lisa and Sandra (see below).
2. Answered via email or forwarded to the Chair 7 Newcomer Al-Anon information requests, including one in Spanish
3. Forwarded the next series of bills for Sound Transit Holiday ads (ads will be live late Nov - early Feb) to the Treasurer for payment.
Old Business:
Chat Bot: Scott M.
Scott is just getting started on this and will be determining whether this a value-added service to our website. He has talked to Pierre and wants to survey the products that are available, geared toward nonprofits. He will be asking for help as he gets further along in the process. He does think many phone questions could be answered by a bot.
AIS Service Recognition: We will have a potluck at the Dec. 7th office opening
New Business:
Heather wanted clarification about the Fall Assembly vote on electronic meetings.
Discussion: Electronic meetings will still need to be registered with WSO and have their own ID number with a CMA (contact mailing address). This is sent to WA area and DRs. Regarding AIS district acceptance we will be discussing at the Board Meeting and Teresa H. Is going to be presenting. Hybrid meetings are considered in person by WSO and do not need 2 ID numbers.
Seventh tradition
https://www.seattle-al-anon.org/donationsforms
Next Council Meeting
November 14, at 7:30 pm
Next Board Meeting
October 17, 2024, at 7:00 pm
Adjournment: Al-Anon Declaration
Meeting adjourned at: 8:49 pm
Respectfully submitted by:
Kathy K, Secretary
Thank you for your donations and your support of AIS!
Our funding now comes primarily from:
Donations by Members, Groups, and Districts
Literature Sales
Please send all AIS mail, including checks for literature orders and donations, to:
Seattle AIS
505 Broadway E #400
Seattle, WA 98102-5023
And More ...
MEETING SCHEDULE: Registered Al-Anon groups in the Greater Seattle Area. Hybrid, Concurrent, and in-person meetings are listed.
CALENDAR OF EVENTS: Many events happen throughout the year. Take a look here for events happening this month.
Please visit our Member Resources section for the most up-to-date information on:
List of AIS Officers and Coordinators
Where to Send Donations
District Representatives and Business Meeting Information
AIS Financial Information
Meeting News
News from the Meeting Directory Editor
Meeting changes received since those reported in the September BITS.
Tuesday 7:15 PM Bothell Tuesday Nighters, childcare now available (10/6)
Seattle Al-Anon Information Service
Meeting Directory Editor